What Becomes Possible When You Stop Filtering Yourself
There is a form of self-betrayal that we don't always recognise.
It doesn't look dramatic.
Sometimes it looks like saying yes when you want to say no.
Staying quiet when you have something to say.
Choosing what is expected instead of what feels right for you.
Waiting for the right time.
Waiting until you are completely ready.
These choices can look responsible and we don't realise what is happening.
We are abandoning ourselves.
I know this pattern.
For a long time, I thought being responsible and prepared was simply part of who I was.
But I also learned that there is a difference between being responsible and putting yourself second.
Between considering others and abandoning your own desires.
At some point, I start asking myself another question: What do I actually want.
Not: What should I do? or What makes sense?
That question can be difficult.
Especially when you have spent years being good at adapting.
Because when you stop filtering yourself you may discover that you already know more than you thought.
You know what interests you.
You know what no longer feels right.
You know where you want to go next.
Perhaps this time you can listen to yourself.
And take one step toward what is truly yours.
Not because other people don't matter.
But because you matter too.
And perhaps that is where a new chapter begins.
Until our next conversation,
Nadejda